Application Hell
Sarcastic humor, yes it is the healer of our soul. A cup of reality mixed in with some slap-my-face humor put in the form of two poems. Laughing our way to the grave, now there's a plan.
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| Application Hell |
By:
Barbara Tremblay Cipak |
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Do you know how many jobs are out there?
Apparently, the superabundance is so overwhelming,
it will make me cry with gratitude.
The choices are spectacular!
Employers en masse, like a parade of dancing cash.
Sixteen hours of resume revamping,
twenty two hours of cover letter re-design,
and days of emailing to those who are dying to hire me.
Oh yes.
I warned my neighbours of the coming onslaught.
Checked the local bylaws to ensure the parade of opportunity conformed.
Adorned my body in pinstripes
The hair. You should see the hair:
Arched at the edges, it screams Management Material!
Oh yes. All is good.
Six months have passed.
Do you know how many jobs are NOT out there?
Apparently, the drought is so overwhelming,
I had to stop crying. I couldn't afford the tissues.
The choices for car washing, flipping burgers and pouring coffee, spectacular.
I'm not educated to wash, flip, and pour,
I really should have planned better.
Employers must be IN Mass.
And cash doesn't dance. Credit cards do.
Sixteen hours of resume revamping,
Twenty hours of cover letter re-design and months of emailing,
gave me one thing I didn't have, cramps.
Oh yes.
The bylaws need revamping, Employer onslaughts, went with the wind.
About my hair. It's a lovely shade of in-shock grey.
Pinstripes? Let's not go there.
So what have I done for me lately?
I whipped out the good china to have a coffee
Didn't have time to use it before.
Unemployed class, all is good.
http://www.drageda.com
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